Look Into My Eyes


I don’t know about you, but I am totally the kind of person who sometimes casually glances into windows when I walk by a house. Not in a creepy way. It’s not like I stop and cup my hand at my brow with my nose pressed to the glass, it’s just a turn of the head and keep on going. You know? I’m just curious to see how other people live. Besides, I kinda feel that if you have your drapes open at night with all the lights on then you don’t mind people occasionally glancing in at you. As a general rule in my house, unless its Christmas and I want you to see the lights on my Christmas tree, the drapes get closed when the sun goes down. I could never understand how some can live without any kind of curtains in the windows at all. Maybe that’s because as a kid we always had something up at every window. My mother would even hang a flat sheet in the window if for some reason there weren’t any curtains up (like when they were in the laundry or we had just moved).

I also look at other people out in public and try to guess (to myself, of course) what they’re thinking, what emotions they are feeling, where they are going, what music their listening to or even what their name is. You’d be surprised how much you can read in a persons eyes as they speed walk by you.

What do passersby see when they look into my eyes? Is it a never ending list of things I have to do? Is it a slideshow of some past performance? Is it a parade of wig heads with hairpieces I want to make? Is it happiness or melancholia? Kindness or a resting bitch? Gratitude or thoughtlessness? Can they tell when I’m listening to Fantasia or Purcell or a recording I just made?

Oh, yeah, I’m certain it’s easy to tell when I’m listening to Fantasia (whether I’m mouthing the words or not)! Overall, I think it’s very easy to know what’s going on  behind my eyes. Whether you are talking to me or passing me on the street, you can immediately tell that my “drapes” are way, way…..WAY open. I tend to be too open, too trusting. I’m also a terrible liar. My closest friends know that if you want to know how I really feel about something just look real closely at my face. My eyes give it away every time.

I never really liked my eyes because they are so dark, like unchanging puddles of ink. I have always wanted some kind of color in them, any color. I can’t tell you how many pairs of baby blue, jade green, wolf grey or honey hazel contacts I have purchased over the years: Drapes. And when it comes to sun glasses, I like them big and jet black: Drapes.